Day 231: 6 Reasons Why I'd Not Date You.
- You're a complete Bollywood movie buff. I simply cannot stand when you quote a 'filmy dialogue' from some Khan movie every time I flip my hair or when I give you a i-am-not-interested-until-you-try-harder look. Stop acting like every time we have a conversation there are dancers in matchy dresses around us and some chirpy-beats playing as the backdrop. I can't stand your long sentimental philosophies about life and relationships. Wait, what. Do I even know you sir?
- You don't have a good haircut. Call me selective, but good looks or charm is secondary for me. I won't even find you attractive if you do not have hair that blows with the wind and falls carelessly over your eyes. And, did i tell you, no curls in the queue please !
- Your taste in music is that of a fourth grader. Dude, get over Enrique, Backstreet boys or the metal shit. I mean I'd dig you if you were a metal head when I was in first year of college. But, uh it's noise to me now. If you don't listen to Angus and Julia Stone, you're a freaking loser. Your playlist on the phone has no trance or ambient or indie. You don't know the difference between trance and house? Get out of here, before I call the cops.
- You don't have a single Converse tee in your wardrobe. Okay, I am a sucker for Converse. I own a dozen of them sneakers. It's still okay if you don't have even a black sneaker. But no tees are a complete no-no. I know it is so high school. I love high school and definitely have a thing for guys in converse tees.
- You flatter me way too much. Stop texting me all the time. Look, girls might flutter their eye lashes and blush when you tell them how you've never seen someone like them ever. I will not. Stop lying. It's okay to compliment someone when you find them attractive. I'd do that when I like someone, but stop being so cheesy. It's turning me off already.
- Okay, this is serious now. You've got a bad breath? Please don't come any closer. Men don't even brush their teeth often, believe it or not. Do you even realize you stink when you talk to people. You smell like a garbage bin, ever wondered if a girl would ever want to kiss you, or moreover would she like it? Please carry mint gums and mouthwash around. I'll pretend that we don't know each other, meanwhile.